Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Julie & Julia

Mine is not a movie review blog, but this is what's on my mind.

I loved "Julie & Julia." Really, though, I just love Julia. Amy McAdams is forgettable and her character is regrettable. She's self-absorbed and has terrible coping skills for a grownup. She is also neatly eclipsed by a great actress playing a great person.

Julia Child, as portrayed by the skillful Ms. Streep, is a larger-than-life and utterly lovable personality. She is so -herself- with her fluted voice and florid gestures. She is without apology for her candor or her love for butter. She is pure glory in her lust for food and her wonderful husband. Their relationship is boundlessly wonderful and she has that perfect air of a woman who is loved for what she is. She's hilarious and her laugh is singular and quintessentially her own.

I planned to take my mother to see this film. My mother is an amazing cook herself and very much belongs among the ranks of the self-made. Julia Child or Paula Deen are great role models for her best self, and I knew she would love it. However, I have been positively skint since moving, and I couldn't take her to the movies. So, when she saw it on her own, she texted me two things. First, that she needs a string of pearls, post haste. I put it on the list. Second, that Julia Child was hers and hers alone, and they borrowed her without asking. She said she wanted to stand in the theater and explain to people that she has the same pots, uses the same butter, and knew this story long before they did. I love my mother, and she deserves her relationship with Julia. She reminded me of a much younger girl, who's upset because she liked a band long before they were popular, and these johnny come latelies are ruining everything.

I myself have never prepared a single recipe from Mastering the Art of French Cooking. I have been inspired to try by this film, and I can't wait to dive headfirst into an aspic or something equally exotic. But I learned my taste and cooking ability and shamelessness for my true self from my mother. She has kissed us and flipped us off and told the stories of her life from her vantage point at the stove, bathed in her own sweat, glowing with butter, making our sometimes very poor house smell like a king's kitchen. In the film, Mr. Child sits and watches Julia cook, much as I always watched my mom, and they share a joke about the relative heat of a canneloni and the male genitals when aroused (see the film.) I saw there my mother sauteing onions and laughing when there was reason to laugh. I saw there my husband, who supports me in everything I love, and adores me in the way that every woman should be adored. Like my mother, I took this film very personally. We're a foodie family; a baguette is never just a baguette.

It was wonderful. I will see it again. I will advise everyone to see it. And I have a shopping list.

1. Mastering the Art of French Cooking,any edition
2. 1 lb good European butter
3. 1 bottle Burgundy wine
4. 1 string of pearls
5. The ingredients of my husband's favorite dish. It's his birthday on Saturday, and I can't do much. But, like my mom, I can always do that.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Tolerance

I have been wrestling of late with a hard idea. Wresting, struggling... these are the words. I am overcome by this issue again and again. Like the guardian at the gate, it refuses to move until I learn the answer, speak the password, guess Rumplestiltskin's name.

I am tolerant. I am exceedingly tolerant and pluralist in all things. I want to welcome everyone, learn from everyone, create a place for everyone. My problem is the specific issue of intolerance. How can I welcome and learn from people who will not welcome or learn from me, or my brother, or my best friend? How can I pry open my heart to people who keep theirs blind, deaf, and dead to the world?

I should feed my enemies. I should invite them to the feast and serve them in any way I can; make my open heart their home and lead by example. These last few weeks I have not been able to get there. All I can think about is marching on temples, creating fear to match the fear they have set upon our state... In short, all I can think of is revenge and counterstrike.

Intellectually, I know this is folly and worse than folly. This is the road to war.

I found myself on this road for the first time this November. The pit of my stomach grows icy with rage, my chest burns, and I want my pain to spread. I trudge up this rocky road, burning and cursing and not thinking. My better nature is the hint of a hint of a faraway drum, but my primal need for vengeance is beating a fever pace up and over this hill into enemy territory. Once there, I can think only of bringing this struggle to hellish fruition. The road I travel is littered with concepts and words and laws and boundaries, all cast aside upon the road to battle. Over the rest of the hill, I find only dead men and women who can no longer see those causes for which they fought and fell. I know this is not my road. I am surprised at myself for walking it. I can leave my weapons here with the dead; I trust them to let no one take them up again. I can turn around and walk home.

I'm not going to say I'm not angry anymore. I am still very angry and that keeps a candle burning on what is yet to be done. But our people need not fight on the other side of that hill.

We have found something to fight for. We don't have to settle for a few small-minded groups to fight against.

We must build a new world. We must not be afraid. And yes, we must serve our enemies, invite them to the feast, and endure their ignorance until they learn. They will learn. Their children will learn. Tolerance for all, equality to all.

Times will change.

We shall overcome.

So mote it be.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Married 17 Months

you smell like sweet wonder
like the brown mouth
of a clean river
exotic spice
and milk at home
combined
so familiar
and yet so foreign
comforting and yet
compelling
deeply known
and confusing as hell
like a book I have read
a thousand times
but sometimes
the ending changes

Copyright Meg Elison 2008