Republicans

It is difficult, as a democrat (a registered one, anyway, not really) not to gloat. It is hard to find compassion for this ailing political party that seems to have no compassion for anyone but those privileged from birth and 100% normal. But I am trying.

Really, there is nothing I would like to see more than Rush Limbaugh getting bigger, fatter, greedier, louder, and eating himself and his fans.

But when it gets to the point that a racist, sexist, creedist, homophobic, foam-at-the-mouth drug addict is referred to as the "voice of the party," what in the living hell is going on? When decent men like Michael Steele grovel and crawl to this hate-mongering clown, apologizing for correctly referring to his words as "ugly and incendiary," what has happened? Where is the Republican party's spine?

For a moment, let me pretend to be a republican. Let's say I am a free-market capitalist, believe in personal responsibility, and value small government. (I can sort of get behind fiscal conservatives; social conservatives arouse my rage like nothing else.) Anyway, if I were a republican, I would be very angry with Steele and Bobby Jindal right now. This party has the opportunity right now to snatch back its dignity and its fire. Jindal, after the State of the Union address, had the opportunity to intelligently disagree and allow for the mistakes of the Bush administration as the party's own and something to learn from. Instead, Jindal and the party at large seem to be pretending that Bush II was not a republican, that the last eight years were not their mess, and that countrified little homilies coming from a nonwhite face are enough to present an opposition to our brilliant president. Disagree with his policies, Bobby. Make us understand why government intervention won't work. But don't invoke Katrina as someone else's failure. You're the governor of Louisiana, for gods' sake. Tell the truth about it.

And Michael Steele. You were right. Rush is "an entertainer." His words are "ugly and incendiary." You were right, and you were telling the truth. Who made you capitulate a lie when you were telling the truth? It's not for nothing you've been chosen as the new (BLACK) face of the party. You are supposed to distance yourself from the white country-club blowhards that the people don't respond to anymore. For gods' sake, you are aligning yourself with a man who makes fun of purple heart recipients, Parkinson's sufferers, and insists that blacks get ahead only because they are black! Grow a spine! Tell Rush off! Remind us what made the party great, adopt a Reagan-ish kinder conservatism. Do something other than crawl before Jabba the Rush and show your belly! Have you no pride? Call Rush on his utter lack of shame!

If this was my party, I'd be lit. I'd feel hijacked. I'd feel misrepresented and ruled by fools.

This is not my party, and I am trying not to be too amused watching it self-cannibalize.

I know who speaks for me. I don't always agree with our president, but I respect him. I don't love our secretary of state, but I have confidence in her. I really like Keith Olbermann, but I'm frankly relieved that no one thinks he's the voice of my party. John Stewart is my absolute favorite, but we all know better than to take him seriously.

And we are supposed to take that Oxycontin sniffing, woman-hating, racist, ranting, paranoid prince of putz seriously? (Megadittoes!)

Who speaks for you?